Transition & Change
A few years ago I heard a segment on NPR about the liminal space. The liminal space is time we experience during transition. Like the first few months of a new job or bringing home a new baby or pet. It’s that space in time when you’re uncertain and unfamiliar because there has been a change in your daily life. Most of us despise the liminal space. We want to move through our lives with certainty, familiarity, and comfort. This particular segment was about how people should practice being comfortable in the liminal space. I remember thinking that this was the most yogic thing I’d ever heard on NPR.
We will constantly navigate liminal spaces throughout our entire lives because change is the one thing we will all experience, guaranteed. Nothing every stays the same. We know this looking at our kids, our parents, our selves. Some of the changes we experience sneak up on us over time - gray hair anyone? Some changes happen suddenly. Or some changes - like my oldest son going to college in the fall - feel like they are happening suddenly, but have been slowly evolving for the past 18 years.
According to Patanjali in the yoga sutras, we suffer from change because we identify ourselves with the parts of us that are ever changing rather than the part of us that is eternal.
“Innocence of our Divine nature encourages identification with the ever changing, rather than with the inner stillness of the heart.”
Sutra 2.5
Ask yourself, “Who are you?” My answer would be: “I’m Kate. I am a yoga instructor and studio owner. I have brown hair and brown eyes.” But maybe in twenty years my hair turns silver and I no longer own the yoga studio. Does that mean I’m not Kate? Which parts of me do not change?
We may call that unchanging part of us by different names. I often refer to it as “the true self”. Others may call it the soul, the witness, or the holy spirit. I believe that our yoga and meditation practice give us the opportunity to experience and be aware of our true selves. Tapping into my own inner stillness and becoming an observer has always helped me in times of transition.
So, besides uncertainty, why do we avoid change? Because it’s hard! It requires work. We have to learn new things, be vulnerable, and sometimes take risks. This is especially true for those of us who are aging. (That’s a trick. That’s all of us.) Opening ourselves to the unknown can be a scary thing. Additionally, change often takes patience.
One of my favorite things to see in movies are montages. A montage is a part of the movie, typically set to music, that shows snippets of time during a transition for one of the characters. Rocky training to box in Siberia in Rocky IV, Daniel winning matches in a karate tournament in The Karate Kid, the baptism scene in the first Godfather movie. These are some of my favorites.
I think the reason I like movie montages so much is because they are a fantasy. What better way to get through change than to do it in less than 3 minutes, set to a great song? What would be the soundtrack to your current transition? How do you tap into the unchanging part of yourself?
With gratitude,
Kate
